I have never had the desire to go out at 5 am the day after Thanksgiving to fight the crowds for the best deals of the holiday season. I know several people who do. One lady that I used to work with would even map out her entire day, hitting the best stores first, usually for hugely discounted electronics, and by that evening have most of her Christmas shopping done!
That just sounds too stressful for me and definitely not worth how-ever-much money could possibly be saved. I’d rather save my sanity!!!
On Wednesday of this week I told Jeremy that I really didn’t care what we did for the long weekend, I was up for pretty much anything, but I did want to have a few hours to myself one day to do whatever I felt like doing at the time. I didn’t have anything that really NEEDED to be done, and that is how I wanted it to stay. I just wanted some serious down time!
The past week or so, I have not been so easy to live with. Just ask my kids. It’s not been a pretty picture. I wish I could have a “do over”, but obviously that’s not possible. One night I just cried and cried because I could still see little Emery’s surprise on his precious, innocent face when I shouted at him for who-knows-what. I just hate myself for that!
And that wasn’t the only night I cried while my husband just hugged me or rubbed my back. I can chock it up to hormones or PMS, but that doesn’t undo the damage I did yelling at my children this week. One woman said, “my greatest fear in life is that there really is no PMS and this is just my personality”. Now that’s a scary thought!!!
So as other blogging Mommy’s out there in cyberspace have been writing all week about their many blessings, I’ve been beating myself up at how I’ve been treating mine. Surely they deserve better! Am I ever going to get my mouth and tongue under control? (Proverbs 12:18 “Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing”). I just get so frustrated when I fall into this same ole pattern when life is hurried or too busy or overwhelming me.
This afternoon was my time to myself. I ended up fighting the traffic and standing in lines to buy a few items for our upcoming trip to New York. However, with no set time to be home the waiting didn’t bother me and I rather enjoyed myself. And the best part was when I returned home, I was greeted by my daughter who said, “Oh Mommy, I am so glad you came back.” (Hmmm… how did she know there was any doubt? Ha!)
I also couldn’t wait to see Jeremy’s reaction to my being back. You see, while I was out, I stopped by the Estee Lauder makeup counter and let the makeup artist “have her way with me”, so to speak. Since I don’t wear much makeup normally (around the house I only wear a moisturizer), it seemed to me I looked more like a clown. So what was Jeremy’s response? “Ummm, it looks kinda whorish. But I think I like it.”
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